This is a letter that I wish I could write to my 16 year old self who was suffering from low self-esteem and teenage depression.
I know that life seems really hard and confusing now but this is truly a temporary condition. You have seen so little of the world and have experienced so little of you life. You should not define your life by the failures that you have experienced rather have hope that you will soon leave embarrassment of High School and gloom of South SanFrancisco. I know you stay up a night wondering why people don’t like you why you are so unappealing to girls, it’s not you seriously, you’re not ugly. You are a fine person you are doing exactly what you should be doing getting all the shit and pain out of the way, better days are ahead trust me, I am you.
Forget about popularity, those people don’t matter to you. Forget about the girls, they don’t want you now but they will. Just because you are Asian does not make you a nerd or unattractive, you will see, in college you will do fine in all of that. Continue to read and do your art, keep running. You know one day you will qualify for Boston and you will run faster at 30 than you did at 16.
You doing great, mom and dad are doing their best they can. They want what’s best for you but they are just people, you have to see that. At 36 you will become a father and you will see that life gets better every year. Understand that this, all this shit that you are feeling is fleeting that it will go away with time, If I could just change one thing about my teenage years it would be that I want you to feel just a little happier about your life. You’re going to be alright, try not to dwell on the past and worry too much about the future, do your best to just experience the now, you’ll be a lot happier for it.